Matthew Clapham
Aug 14, 2023

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A modest proposal, Kristin:

Hack into the venue's CCTV storage system, and use the footage to identify every audience member who didn't laugh hard enough. Or at the right bits.

Track them down, kidnap them, and subject them to a comedy brainwashing program. Those eyelid contraptions from A Clockwork Orange might come in handy?

Eventually you will have converted the entire comedy-going public in your chosen catchment area to your specific brand of humour.

You could maybe recruit the ones that did laugh hard enough as assistants to speed up the process.

Disclaimer: there may be some legal and ethical downsides to this approach. Check with law enforcement agencies and attorneys prior to implementation.

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Matthew Clapham
Matthew Clapham

Written by Matthew Clapham

Professional translator by day. Writer of silly and serious stuff by night. Also by day, when I get fed up of tedious translations. Founder of Iberospherical.

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