I recall a General Studies A-level question which read: 'If Shakespeare (it might actually have been Dickens - whatevs) had been alive today, he would have written for Eastenders and Brookside, but wouldn't have touched Emmerdale Farm. Discuss.'

I can't remember if I did that essay or not. But a lad at my school did end up doing a scriptwriting course in the States and I think does work in TV now. Probably for Emmerdale. He was obsessed with Kubrick's 2001. Maybe he was responsible for the plane crash armageddon storyline.